Oh, What a Day

I wonder how things come together to shape one's day. I woke up this morning with a list of things I wanted to get done at work. List formulating in my head as I was in the shower, I was struck with an interruptive thought that I needed to be open to what would come my way. Arriving at work, I paused by the parking lot to say goodbye to the fourth graders who were boarding busses for a field trip to see the state capitol. As I was talking to the teachers, one of our secretaries ran out and said that I was needed in the health office. I ran in, and such started a day that ended up with a ride with a child in an ambulance, and a visit to the ER in the same hospital where Peter died. I didn't even think about it until I walked through those doors and suddenly the familiar surroundings knocked on that part of my subconscious, threatening to pull me down. I was strong, and of course felt strong in my role as surrogate parent for the child as I was her advocate and protector. Familiar process. I recognized the phlebotomist as someone who had worked on Peter both in the ER and on the floor. I told her so. She works in three different hospitals, so was noncommittal, but she came back in the room later and said she did remember me. I saw the head ER doctor, the one that was so kind to Peter and me on one of those first visits, the one who said he was so sorry for him, and for me, and for our family. "You're a good man," he said to Peter. "This shouldn't be happening to you." The doctor was working at a computer at one end of a station, and I just had a grateful thought, and walked by. So many months ago. A lifetime, literally.

I didn't return to school until noon, and then in fact I had district duties off campus. I said to my principal, "Nice seeing you today!" as she dropped me off at my car after picking me up at the hospital.

Later I took the truck to orchestra so Daniel could use my car to pick up my mom at the San Francisco airport. Another feeling of deja vu. Being in the truck, smelling it's familiar scent, feeling the way it rolls over the bumps, then laughing at the stories attached to the truck, including the golf balls. Bittersweet thoughts, and I allowed myself the leisurely mulling over them as I drove the twenty minutes to practice.

So, no, I never got to any of the items that were on the list this morning. But that is perfectly OK.